A part of me is dreading writing what I am about to write about, but it has been on my mind so much lately! I feel like a frequently bring it up in conversation with friends because it is witnessed far too often–rape and rape culture are not properly addressed. I know that I mentioned it in another post but first and foremost, a person does not warrant sexual advances and aggression due to what they are wearing. No one “asks” for anything unless they actually ask for it. Consent is consent and you either have it or you do not.
You should avoid someone who:
- Has a large sense of entitlement. If you receive a compliment from someone, this does not mean that you owe them anything. Same if they buy you dinner or do anything of value to you. This seems like a no-brainer, but some people are skilled manipulators.
- Uses manipulative tactics. For example, a person may make you feel bad about yourself and that what you should be doing is pleasing them.
- Sends you anything electronically or says anything to you that makes you feel uncomfortable. Not uncomfortable in the way that a new novel may challenge your beliefs, but uncomfortable in the way that you are creeped out or feel threatened.
- Says rape jokes. Yes, this is a thing. No, they are not just jokes. They perpetuate the thought that rape is something to be laughed at and that is not to be taken lightly.
I feel like there are many more archetypes that fit this bill and every individual experiences rape culture differently than another. Please share your thoughts and tell your friends to just say NO to these kinds of people!
For additional examples of rape culture, I found this great article.